We Experience What We Attract
You are over stretched, you’re working your tail off, you’re trying to get things accomplished and lead a team of volunteers to achieve your vision of success. Yet you find that some of your team members are combative and your best performers are dropping off to join another committee. What’s going on? Why doesn’t anyone appreciate what you are doing and all the time that you are contributing to this effort?
You can either look at this as a situation as— it is everyone else’s fault, i.e. they don’t get it, they want to make me look bad, they are not team players; OR, you can look inward at why you are hearing this message. What message are you sending that is being returned to you in this way? How are you sending a message that makes people combative, or that you really don’t want a team?
“You govern your surroundings by the nature of what is taking place in your consciousness.” ~ Joel S. Goldsmith
Recently, I was informed by two different sources from completely different situations, that they had been blindsided by something that I had done. I was totally taken aback. Of course this would never be my intention, but hearing it from two people indicated to me that I needed to take a step back and see how I had attracted this to myself. What thoughts was I dealing with internally that didn’t take into consideration the efforts of others? How is blindsiding showing up in my life? These are tough questions to face, I know.
In this case, I think it comes down to the desire to have full control so that we would have the desired outcome. I was not trusting enough of others. I was not trusting that the right thing would happen, that the outcome is bigger than me, that it’s OK to let others take on the tasks and even fail possibly. Sometimes that is what needs to happen and I need to trust that. By trusting others and trusting the process, the doors to possibilities and success blow wide open and feel so freeing to me. I don’t have to do it all. I admit that I had been feeling as if I had to do it all and that people were letting me down. I was attracting that.
One of my favorite quotes is:
“The world is full of people who will hurt and disappoint you. Unfortunately, those are the only kind of people that there are.” ~ Unknown
We have a role in everything that happens to us. And we have full control in how we react to it. Sometimes we need help in changing our behavior. I’m committed to trusting more, delegating more and letting things happen. And if you see me trying to be too controlling—call me on it, please!
Lynn Zettler founded CORE IMPACT COACHING, Inc. (formerly LifeAction Coaching), an Executive and Professional Coaching firm serving business owners, and C-suite and corporate professionals, in 2006. Leveraging from her 20-year corporate and leadership experience from The Dow Chemical Company, and Coach University training, Lynn partners with clients to develop their leadership and communication styles, while aligning with their integrity and vision. With a specialty in effective communications, Lynn engages organizations through workshops and trainings related to topics such as: Leading With Influence, Core Values at Work, The One Page Business PlanTM, and many others.